Standings

I finally bit the bullet. Today being my birthday and all, I figured what better present than to watch straight cash, homey, slide through my fingers and down a sewer grate. So I figured up the standings.

First of all, congratulations to Chip. His bizarrely awesome 14-2 in the NFL gave him his first weekly win since, like, August with a 34-15. Second of all, remember all that parity I was talking about? It's about to fly out the window.

Chris "Spawn of Satan" Smith is doing his best Kristy anti-Christ impersonation, refusing to ever have a bad week as the rest of us stumble and bumble around him. His 33-16 was unmatched for second and two games better than anyone else, allowing him to open a four-game lead for first overall. And speaking of Kristy the anti-Christ, she has wormed her way up to second overall despite still not having won a week this season.

Both took advantage of Rob's 28-21, which he got to drop, but the 29-18 he replaced it with wasn't enough to keep him from sliding to third two weeks after he briefly took over first. Cullen (31-18) is now a game back of third, while Chip has moved back to fifth and I've fallen all the way to sixth compliments of a brutal 29-20.

Still, that was better than a lot of people did last week. Unfortunately they're all bottom feeders. Bob was a cool 26-23 after a horrific 6-10 NFL showing, leaving him in grave danger of being caught by Cheryl (28-21) and Lonnie (31-18), while Lane was an even more ghastly 21-28, leaving him in even greater danger of being caught by big Ed in the spirited battle for last overall. Lane's strategy of going with all home teams in scratchers has tempted me this season, but, like when George encourages Jerry to confront Dr. Siffaredes about his skin rash, it backfired with an 8-8.

I guess I'm lucky I never tried that.

Anyway, here are the standings. And one final note: I think it's rather remarkable that Cheryl and Lonnie are tied both in the standings without a dropped week and the standings with a dropped week. It's not remarkable in the sense that they both suck at picking who's going to win football games, but the amazing part is that they're dead even despite the fact that their picks are quite different every week. It's like they have some sort of cosmic attraction to each other; one that has bonded their love and fated them to a life of throwing $200 away every football season.

It's sweet, and it's beautiful.

Standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16 (377-178, .679)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18 (372-182, .671)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21 (370-183, .669)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18 (371-184, .668)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15 (371-185, .667)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20 (368-187, .663)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18 (366-190, .658)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23 (359-197, .646)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21 (353-202, .636)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18 (353-202, .636)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28 (339-214, .613)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20 (337-214, .612)