Week 19 standings

Well, Little Robbie went all Doug Flutie on us and had his Hail Mary caught in the end zone, rolling to his second weekly win with a 29-9 that edged Amy by two games. That's the good news for for Taunty McShittalker. The bad news is that he threw the pass at the end of the third quarter, and as well as he did he only beat me and Chris by three games - not enough to gain much ground on the top of the overall standings.

Still, having the stones to pick Oregon pushed Rob and Amy ahead of everyone else, and that pick also vaulted Rob over Cullen and Kristy and into third place - by five ten-thousandths of a point. John Fox and Al Groh would definitely go into the prevent here while kneeling down on every offensive snap, so I encourage Rob to do the same.

Kristy struggled to a 20-18, which she got to drop, but it wasn't enough to keep me from passing her for second. Still, she, I, Rob and Cullen (25-13) remain in a virtual tie, with Amy just two games out of the money. This is crazy, man, this is crazy ...

Sadly for all of us, Chris kept a relatively firm grip on first with time running out. Even with the bowls counting double and the NFL triple, it's going to be tough to make up those nine games with two weeks left. Then again, I'm considering penalizing him nine games for sending all of his picks over the past two weeks via individual text message, so we'll see what happens.

Overall standings
(weekly win in bold; worst week in red)

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19, 26-7, 13-7, 14-16, 26-12 (509-242, .678)
2. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16, 25-8, 12-8, 16-14, 26-12 (500-251, .666)
3. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18, 19-14, 11-9, 18-12, 29-9 (487-245, .6653)
4. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21, 26-7, 13-7, 19-11, 20-18 (494-249, .6648)
5. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 24-9, 11-9, 14-16, 25-13 (497-254, .662)
6. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 22-11, 12-8, 17-13, 27-11 (484-251, .659)
7. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20, 18-15, 14-6, 0-30, 21-17 (487-264, .648)
8. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21, 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18, 22-11, 11-9, 16-14, 22-16 (470-265, .639)
9. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19, 23-10, 9-11, 20-10, 22-16 (483-278, .635)
10. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22, 20-13, 12-8, 12-18, 22-16 (469-282, .625)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28, 24-9, 12-8, 14-16, 14-24 (440-303, .592)

Week 19 games

I'll have the standings out tonight or tomorrow or whenever I sober up, but in the meantime here are the games. This is it, people. Our last big week. Put up or shut up. And remember, like last year, the NFL playoffs count THREE games each. So you should definitely take the blindfold off before throwing the dart. Cheryl, I'm talking to you....

Bowls
Houston vs. Air Force (Wednesday)
Oregon State vs. Pittsburgh (Wednesday)
Boston College vs. Vanderbilt (Wednesday)
Kansas vs. Minnesota (Wednesday)
Louisiana State vs. Georgia Tech (Wednesday)
South Carolina vs. Iowa (Thursday)
Georgia vs. Michigan State (Thursday)
Nebraska vs. Clemson (Thursday)
Pennsylvania State vs. Southern California (Thursday)
Cincinnati vs. Virginia Tech (Thursday)
Mississippi vs. Texas Tech (Friday)
Kentucky vs. East Carolina (Friday)
Utah vs. Alabama (Friday)
Buffalo vs. Connecticut (Saturday)
Ohio State vs. Texas (Monday)
Ball State vs. Tulsa (Tuesday)

NFL playoffs
Indianapolis at San Diego (Saturday)
Atlanta at Arizona (Saturday)
Philadelphia at Minnesota (Sunday)
Baltimore at Miami (Sunday)

Week 18

And then there were two.

Lonnie said in your face, sucka, to anyone out there who predicted - or even bet money - that he'd go two full picks races without winning a week, notching a 20-10 that allowed him to edge Kristy by a game and Rob by two. All three were freakishly good in college, going 12-2, so the difference was NFL - and it tells you how fucked up the NFL was last week that Lonnie's 8-8 gave him the edge. Only Bob (10-6) and Amy (9-7) won more NFL games than they lost, with Rob carding a cool 6-10.

But the biggest news is that Cheryl and Lane have lost another member of their dwindling schnide club. Now there are only two people left who haven't won a week. Who thinks they'll both pull it off? Neither? Just one? Which one? This could be a really cool side pool ...

More developments:

• Five people dropped the week, including Chris, me, Cullen, Chip, Cheryl. As a result, the overall standings changed little, though Kristy cut a pretty big chunk out of Chris' lead and I, Cullen and Rob are in statistical dead heats for third. Then again, I did stretch my lead over Cullen from one one/thousandth of a point to three one/thousandths of a point, so he should probably just give up now.
  
• Chip made the curious decision to not participate a week after getting the win, carding an 0-30 that let Amy pass him for sixth. Has anyone talked to that blimey bloke? We should probably make sure he hasn't been taken out by Jason Bourne. Oh, come on, you guys didn't really think he was working overseas in media relations, did you? What do American companies need media relations in Europe for? They LOVE us.
  
• This is the second-to-last big week. Week 20 will be a compilation of the BCS title game and the NFL playoffs. And remember for our side pool, this is when Cheryl shines ...
  
• Dad's second straight 0-fer has given me permission to drop him from the overall standings. Just too much pressure from Lane I guess.

Here are the updated standings. As always, alert me to mistakes, and don't forget we have a game tonight:

Standings
(weekly win in bold; worst week in red)

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19, 26-7, 13-7, 14-16 (483-230, .677)
2. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21, 26-7, 13-7, 19-11 (467-228, .672)
3. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16, 25-8, 12-8, 16-14 (474-239, .665)
4. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 24-9, 11-9, 14-16 (472-241, .662)
5. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18, 19-14, 11-9, 18-12 (458-236, .660)
6. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 22-11, 12-8, 17-13 (457-240, .656)
7. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20, 18-15, 14-6, 0-30 (466-247, .654)
8. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21, 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18, 22-11, 11-9, 16-14 (448-249, .643)
9. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19, 23-10, 9-11, 20-10 (461-262, .638)
10. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22, 20-13, 12-8, 12-18 (447-266, .627)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28, 24-9, 12-8, 14-16 (419-275, .604)

Week 18 games

I'll have the standings out tonight or tomorrow, but I wanted to make sure everyone had the games in time - especially that riveting Wednesday night matchup.

Bowls
Hawaii vs. Notre Dame (Wednesday)
Florida Atlantic vs. Central Michigan (Friday)
West Virginia vs. North Carolina
Wisconsin vs. Florida State
Miami vs. California
Northern Illinois vs. Louisiana Tech (Sunday)
North Carolina State vs. Rutgers (Monday)
Missouri vs. Northwestern (Monday)
Maryland vs. Nevada (Tuesday)
Oklahoma State vs. Oregon (Tuesday)
Western Michigan vs. Rice (Tuesday)

NFL
St. Louis at Atlanta
New England at Buffalo
Kansas City at Cincinnati
Detroit at Green Bay
Tennessee at Indianapolis
New York Giants at Minnesota
Carolina at New Orleans
Cleveland at Pittsburgh
Oakland at Tampa Bay
Chicago at Houston
Jacksonville at Baltimore
Washington at San Francisco
Miami at New York Jets
Dallas at Philadelphia
Seattle at Arizona
Denver at San Diego

Week 17

And down the stretch we come.

There are four weeks left in our little race, but in all likelihood the next two will decide who's in the, uhhh, coconuts and who isn't. From now on, all college games will count double and there are about to be a lot of them in the form of bowls - starting with six this week highlighted by the much-anticipated Southern Miss-Troy game on Sunday. I'm totally kidding. Who the fuck cares about that game? But if that was the criteria for a bowl, we'd have about six so clearly it isn't the point.

Before we get started, however, there's the little matter of Week 16, and congrats to Chip for cherry-picking the victory with a 14-6 that edged, sigh, Chris and Kristy by a single game. His contest-best 12-4 in the NFL was the difference, and as a bonus Larry Wayne also crept back ahead of Amy in the overall standings for sixth overall.

The only other change in the overall standings was me going ahead of Cullen by a whopping thousandth of a point, but it's significant in that I'm back in the coconuts at third overall. Shouldn't be too hard to sit on that lead for a month.

Otherwise, things stayed about the same because we all had about the same score - save Lonnie and dad. Lonnie's bold moves left him at 9-11, which he got to drop, but having your worst week the week with the fewest games isn't really an optimal situation for your final score. That's what dad knew all along when he didn't bother to participate at all, notching his second 0-fer of the season, but he was comfortable in the knowledge that the Week 2 0-51 remains his worst performance.

Apparently, this few games didn't present enough of a challenge but Lane 'll take it. Looks like he'll hold Ed off for last after all.

Now for the moment you've all been waiting for: The answers to last week's trivia questions.

• What did the bubble boy's father do for a living? He was a Yoo-Hoo truck driver.
• What's the bubble boy's name? Donald
• Why didn't Jerry like his girlfriend in the bubble boy episode? Her laugh
• What kind of car is George driving on their way to the bubble boy's house? A Ford Taurus - mom's dream ride.
• Why can't Kramer go with them to the cabin in the bubble boy episode? He had a golf match at Westchester Country Club.
• What does Jerry write on the autographed picture he gives the waitress at the diner? Actually, I can't remember. Anyone?
• What does George pull out the whale's blowhole? A golf ball.
• What name does the guy who played Henri on Cheers share with a notorious serial killer, which is announced all over the stadium during his date with Elaine? Joel Rifkin.
• Why is this name announced in the stadium? Kramer can't get the ticket Joel left for him at will call.
• What does Jerry get caught doing by the model whose number he recently got? Picking his nose.
• Where did Jerry get said model's number? In an airplane.
• When Woody tells Henri "I thought I told you to get your hands off my girlfriend", what is Henri's reply? "And I thought I told YOU to get me a soda!"
• What's Woody's reply to Henri's reply? "Dang it. Got me on a technicality."

Wasn't that fun? Well, it was fun for me. Here are this week's games and the standings:

Week 17
FCS playoffs
Montana vs. Richmond (Friday)
Bowls
Wake Forest vs. Navy
Colorado State vs. Fresno State
Memphis vs. South Florida
Brigham Young vs. Arizona
Southern Mississippi vs. Troy (Sunday)
Boise State vs. Texas Christian (Tuesday)

NFL
Indianapolis at Jacksonville (Thursday)
Baltimore at Dallas (Saturday)
Cincinnati at Cleveland
San Francisco at St. Louis
New Orleans at Detroit
Pittsburgh at Tennessee
Miami at Kansas City
Arizona at New England
San Diego at Tampa Bay
Houston at Oakland
Buffalo at Denver
New York Jets at Seattle
Atlanta at Minnesota
Philadelphia at Washington
Carolina at New York Giants
Green Bay at Chicago (Monday)

Standings
(Weekly win bold; worst week in red)

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19, 26-7, 13-7 (455-211, .683)
2. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21, 26-7, 13-7 (448-217, .674)
3. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16, 25-8, 12-8 (447-219, .671)
4. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 24-9, 11-9 (446-220, .670)
5. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18, 19-14, 11-9 (440-224, .663)
6. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20, 18-15, 14-6 (441-226, .661)
7. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 22-11, 12-8 (440-227, .660)
8. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21, 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18, 22-11, 11-9 (432-235, .648)
9. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19, 23-10, 9-11 (441-252, .636)
10. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22, 20-13, 12-8 (421-245, .632)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28, 24-9, 12-8 (405-259, .610)
12. Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20, 33-25, 20-13, 0-20 (390-272, .589)

Week 16

Score it Vegas 1, Rob's gut 0.

Rob went with his heart last week while Spawn of Satan Smith and Lucifer's Little Helper Kowalske stuck with their slavish worship of gambling odds, and it wasn't pretty for our hero. Heaven's rejects tied for the win with sizzling 26-7s, while Rob's feelings may have cost him any chance at the prize coconuts by leading him down a 19-14 road.

The result was Chris strengthening his overall lead yet again, with Kristy climbing back up to second overall and notching her first weekly win of the 2008 season (sort of). Rob? Well, this story's protagonist is face down in a gutter at fifth overall with Amy nipping at his heels. It's a fall worthy of an Illinois governor. Or really any governor these days. Jeez, those guys are scumbags.

In other news:

• I carded a 25-8 for third, allowing me to climb into a dead tie with Cullen (24-9) for third overall. We ruled largely because of our contest-best 13-3s in the NFL.
  
• Rob may have thrown in the towel, but Chip put his in one of those bazooka things they use at games and launched it into the second deck with a contest-worst 18-15 that dropped him to seventh and falling. This better not be because he's been watching too much soccer, but something has to explain that 8-8 in the NFL ...
• Lonnie (23-10) extended his lead over his wife (20-13), and note that now that she's slightly ahead of Lane in the standings I don't even use her name anymore. She's just a stereotypical label, as all women should be.
• Speaking of Lane (not to mention women), he bitch-slapped Ed (20-13) back into 12th with a strong 24-9 that shuffled the bottom of the standings for the second week in a row. This is what it would be like if the Lions and Bengals were in the division. In other words, fantastic.
• I think we can all assume from his silence that Lane is a good sport about all of our unsolicited cracks. Either that, or he's patiently preparing for the waiting period to be up on his high-powered rifle.
  

Here are the games, followed by the standings. As you can see, we have but two college games and a full NFL slate because bowls don't start for two Saturdays. So enjoy your extra drinking time, which in Chris and Kristy's case would be human blood.

FCS playoffs
Montana at James Madison (Friday)
Richmond at Northern Iowa

NFL
New Orleans at Chicago (Thursday)
Tampa Bay at Atlanta
Washington at Cincinnati
Detroit at Indianapolis
San Diego at Kansas City
Green Bay at Jacksonville
Seattle at St. Louis
San Francisco at Miami
Buffalo at New York Jets
Tennessee at Houston
Minnesota at Arizona
Denver at Carolina
Pittsburgh at Baltimore
New England at Oakland
New York Giants at Dallas
Cleveland at Philadelphia (Monday)

Standings
(weekly win in bold; worst week in red)

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19, 26-7 (442-204, .684)
2. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21, 26-7 (435-210, .674)
3. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 24-9 (435-211, .673)
4. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16, 25-8 (435-211, .673)
5. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18, 19-14 (429-215, .666)
6. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 22-11 (428-219, .662)
7. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20, 18-15 (427-220, .660)
8. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18, 22-11 (421-226, .651)
9. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19, 23-10 (415-231, .642)
10. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22, 20-13 (409-237, .633)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28, 24-9 (393-251, .610)
12. Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20, 33-25, 20-13 (390-252, .607)

Week 15 standings

The key to the picks race has been discovered. It's called ignorance.

Just as soon as I decide to get out by not paying attention anymore, they pull me back in with my third win of the season that has me right back in the thick of things. My 42-16 was two games better than Rob, Cullen, Amy and Bob, and it allowed me to stop a month-long slide as I went from sixth back up to fourth, one game behind Cullen for third and two behind Rob for second.

And that was far from the only change in the standings after our last full week of college games - though Chris' 39-19 was good enough to keep him comfortably in first. Rob vaulted back up to second after falling to fourth, while Kristy's 37-21 dropped her from second all the way to fifth. At the bottom of the standings, meanwhile, Lonnie finally passed Cheryl, and, in the biggest news of all, Lane finally coughed up his lead over dad and took over last. His 30-28 allowed Ed to gain three games on him even though Ed was three games worse than anyone not named Lane. That means Lane is now losing to a guy with an 0-51 on his resume.

That, my friends, is what you call outdadding dad.

Other occurrences of note:

• Bob was a perfect 16-0 in the FCS playoffs because he had the balls to pick Weber State, but he blew it with a contest-worst 8-8 in the NFL.
• Cullen would have tied for the weekly win had he not changed two MAC games at the last second, both of which he lost. Then again, he also changed two other games that he ended up winning so I guess it evened out. As it was, he tied me for the best scratchers performance with a 7-3.
  
• Amy left the Baltimore-Cincy game out of her NFL picks, and I had to count it as a loss because Chip actually picked Cincinnati.
• Dad had UCLA beating California. Risky pick this season, and even riskier in a week where those two teams didn't play each other. Hey Lane, he's beating you ...
• Again, many thanks to Cullen for doing the standings for me, but, as always, I go back and double-check for the breakdown available on the Word document attachment I e-mail everyone. Our tallies matched perfectly with two exceptions: Cheryl was actually 36-22 instead of 38-20, and dad was 33-25 instead of 32-26. The world would have ended if we hadn't gotten those right, but, then again, Lonnie would probably still be getting his ass handed to him by his wife and Lane would still be in 11th, so I guess they were critical on some level.

Anyway, here are the standings. As I said, if you want to see the breakdown of the week open the Word document.

Standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19 (416-197, .678)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18 (410-201, .671)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18 (411-202, .670)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16 (410-203, .669)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21 (409-203, .668)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20 (409-205, .666)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18 (406-208, .661)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18 (399-215, .650)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19 (392-221, .639)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22 (389-224, .636)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20, 33-25 (370-239, .608)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28 (369-242, .604)

Week 15

No, I still haven't done the standings. Bite me. Here are this week's games, which are important because we have a game tonight. Well, perhaps I use the word "game" a little loosely, but there were pretty slim pickins for Week 15. As promised, there are way fewer matchups, so lack of research time can't be your excuse for sucking.

And remember, again, that the FCS playoff games count double. I'll do the standings tonight. Promise.

ACC
Boston College vs. Virginia Tech

SEC
Alabama vs. Florida

FCS playoffs
Richmond at Appalachian State
Weber State at Montana
Villanova at James Madison
New Hampshire at Northern Iowa

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners
Missouri vs. Oklahoma
Arizona State at Arizona

Scratchers
Middle Tennessee at Louisiana-Lafayette (Wednesday)
Pittsburgh at Connecticut
South Florida at West Virginia
Cincinnati at Hawaii
Western Kentucky at Florida International

NFL
Oakland at San Diego (Thursday)
Jacksonville at Chicago
Minnesota at Detroit
Houston at Green Bay
Cleveland at Tennessee
Cincinnati at Indianapolis
Atlanta at New Orleans
Philadelphia at New York Giants
Kansas City at Denver
Miami at Buffalo
New York Jets at San Francisco
New England at Seattle
St. Louis at Arizona
Dallas at Pittsburgh
Washington at Baltimore
Tampa Bay at Carolina (Monday)

Standings

I finally bit the bullet. Today being my birthday and all, I figured what better present than to watch straight cash, homey, slide through my fingers and down a sewer grate. So I figured up the standings.

First of all, congratulations to Chip. His bizarrely awesome 14-2 in the NFL gave him his first weekly win since, like, August with a 34-15. Second of all, remember all that parity I was talking about? It's about to fly out the window.

Chris "Spawn of Satan" Smith is doing his best Kristy anti-Christ impersonation, refusing to ever have a bad week as the rest of us stumble and bumble around him. His 33-16 was unmatched for second and two games better than anyone else, allowing him to open a four-game lead for first overall. And speaking of Kristy the anti-Christ, she has wormed her way up to second overall despite still not having won a week this season.

Both took advantage of Rob's 28-21, which he got to drop, but the 29-18 he replaced it with wasn't enough to keep him from sliding to third two weeks after he briefly took over first. Cullen (31-18) is now a game back of third, while Chip has moved back to fifth and I've fallen all the way to sixth compliments of a brutal 29-20.

Still, that was better than a lot of people did last week. Unfortunately they're all bottom feeders. Bob was a cool 26-23 after a horrific 6-10 NFL showing, leaving him in grave danger of being caught by Cheryl (28-21) and Lonnie (31-18), while Lane was an even more ghastly 21-28, leaving him in even greater danger of being caught by big Ed in the spirited battle for last overall. Lane's strategy of going with all home teams in scratchers has tempted me this season, but, like when George encourages Jerry to confront Dr. Siffaredes about his skin rash, it backfired with an 8-8.

I guess I'm lucky I never tried that.

Anyway, here are the standings. And one final note: I think it's rather remarkable that Cheryl and Lonnie are tied both in the standings without a dropped week and the standings with a dropped week. It's not remarkable in the sense that they both suck at picking who's going to win football games, but the amazing part is that they're dead even despite the fact that their picks are quite different every week. It's like they have some sort of cosmic attraction to each other; one that has bonded their love and fated them to a life of throwing $200 away every football season.

It's sweet, and it's beautiful.

Standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16 (377-178, .679)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18 (372-182, .671)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21 (370-183, .669)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18 (371-184, .668)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15 (371-185, .667)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20 (368-187, .663)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18 (366-190, .658)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23 (359-197, .646)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21 (353-202, .636)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18 (353-202, .636)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28 (339-214, .613)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20 (337-214, .612)

Week 14

I'll get the standings out tomorrow, but I wanted to make sure everybody had enough time to do their picks on this holiday week. And remember - the FCS playoff games count double.

ACC
Georgia Tech at Georgia
Miami at North Carolina State
South Carolin at Clemson
Virginia at Virginia Tech
Florida at Florida State
Maryland at Boston College
North Carolina at Duke
Vanderbilt at Wake Forest

SEC
Mississippi State at Mississippi (Friday)
Louisiana State at Arkansas (Friday)
Auburn at Alabama
Kentucky at Tennessee

FCS playoffs
South Carolina State at Appalachian State
Colgate at Villanova
Eastern Kentucky at Richmond
New Hampshire at Southern Illinois
Texas State at Montana
Wofford at James Madison
Maine at Northern Iowa
Weber State at Cal Poly

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners
California-Los Angeles at Arizona State (Friday)
Kansas at Missouri
Oregon at Oregon State
Oklahoma at Oklahoma State

Scratchers
West Virginia at Pittsburgh (Friday)
Ohio at Miami (Ohio) (Friday)
Akron at Temple (Friday)
Texas-El Paso at East Carolina (Friday)
Bowling Green at Toledo (Friday)
Fresno State at Boise State (Friday)
Nevada at Louisiana Tech
New Mexico State at Utah State
Houston at Rice
Florida International at Florida Atlantic

NFL
Tennessee at Detroit (Thursday)
Seattle at Dallas (Thursday)
Arizona at Philadelphia (Thursday)
San Francisco at Buffalo
Baltimore at Cincinnati
Indianapolis at Cleveland
Carolina at Green Bay
Miami at St. Louis
New Orleans at Tampa Bay
New York Giants at Washington
Atlanta at San Diego
Pittsburgh at New England
Denver at New York Jets
Kansas City at Oakland
Chicago at Minnesota
Jacksonville at Houston (Monday)

Week 13

I think we can officially call this the most competitive picks race ever.

After 12 weeks, just 1/100th of a point separates spots one through five in the standings, and there's a mere 4/100th between first and ninth. But as close as things are, the same people keep staying in pretty much the same spots - though there were a few changes over the past two weeks.

Rob grabbed first after Week 11 for the first time all season, but then he promptly blew it last weekend as Chris retook the top spot with his third weekly win of the season. His 37-11, fueled by a 13-2 showing in the NFL, beat Kristy, Cullen, me, Amy and Lonnie by two games. Still, Rob remains in second while Kristy stands alone in third despite being one of only four contestants who has yet to register a weekly triumph. Cullen has climbed to fifth, and I have fallen all the way to fifth.

Either we're all really good or we're all really bad, but nobody can seem to pull away.

In other news, as Cullen pointed out, Amy did indeed notch her first triumph of 2008 in Week 11 with a 34-11, though dad and Lane - the missing picks - actually did make things interesting with scores of 33-12 and 32-13, respectively.

I would remind you that I still haven't received entry coconuts from a number of you. You know who you are.

Here are the standings, followed by the games. We have a coveted Wednesday MAC contest, so don't forget.

Standings
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11 (344-162, .680)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14 (344-165, .676)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13 (341-164, .675)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13 (340-166, .672)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13 (339-167, .670)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14 (337-170, .665)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13 (335-172, .661)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14 (333-174, .657)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18 (325-181, .642)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13 (322-184, .636)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19 (316-193, .621)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17 (308-194, .614)

Games
ACC
Miami at Georgia Tech (Thursday)
North Carolina State at North Carolina
Clemson at Virginia
Boston College at Wake Forest
Duke at Virginia Tech
Florida State at Maryland

SEC
Tennessee at Vanderbilt
Citadel at Florida
Arkansas at Mississippi State
Mississippi at Louisiana State

SoCon
Furman at Wofford
Elon at Liberty
Samford at Chattanooga
Appalachian State at Western Carolina

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners
Stanford at California
Oregon State at Arizona
Texas Tech at Oklahoma

Scratchers
Ball State at Central Michigan (Wednesday)
Miami at Toledo (Friday)
Buffalo at Bowling Green (Friday)
Fresno State at San Jose State (Friday)
West Virginia at Louisville
Richmond at William & Mary
New Hampshire at Maine
Colorado State at Wyoming
Central Florida at Memphis
Illinois at Northwestern
Akron at Ohio
McNeese State at Central Arkansas
Brigham Young at Utah
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati
Iowa at Minnesota
Connecticut at South Florida (Sunday)

NFL
Cincinnati at Pittsburgh (Thursday)
Tampa Bay at Detroit
New York Jets at Tennessee
Buffalo at Kansas City
Chicago at St. Louis
New England at Miami
Minnesota at Jacksonville
Philadelphia at Baltimore
Houston at Cleveland
San Francisco at Dallas
Oakland at Denver
Washington at Seattle
New York Giants at Arizona
Carolina at Atlanta
Indianapolis at San Diego
Green Bay at New Orleans (Monday)

Week 12

Sorry for the delay in getting the games out. I'm in Florida working on a very important project, if that's what you want to call playing in an old-man baseball tournament, so I'm running behind.

As I was getting these together, I realized we're coming down the home stretch of full college schedules. As in, there are only, like, two weeks left. So if Lonnie is going to make a move, the time is now.

Here are the games. Oh yeah, I haven't had time to do the standings, so you won't know whether to be pissed or illogically confident. Sorry, again. If somebody's feeling frisky and wants to do last week's standings, be my guest.

Week 12
ACC
Virginia Tech at Miami (Thursday)
Duke at Clemson
North Carolina at Maryland
Wake Forest at North Carolina State
Boston College at Florida State

SEC
Georgia at Auburn
Louisiana-Monroe at Mississippi
South Carolina at Florida
Mississippi State at Alabama
Troy at Louisiana State
Vanderbilt at Kentucky

SoCon
Chattanooga at Citadel
Wofford at Samford
Georgia Southern at Furman
Elon at Appalachian State

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners
Texas at Kansas
California at Oregon State
Nebraska at Kansas State
Texas A&M at Baylor
Arizona at Oregon
California-Los Angeles at Washington

Scratchers
Buffalo at Akron (Thursday)
Cincinnati at Louisville (Friday)
Northwestern at Michigan
Ohio State at Illinois
Massachusetts at New Hampshire
Notre Dame at Navy
William & Mary at James Madison
New Mexico at Colorado State
East Carolina at Southern Mississippi
Brigham Young at Air Force
Louisiana-Lafayette at Florida Atlantic
Tulsa at Houston

NFL
New York Jets at New England (Thursday)
Denver at Atlanta
Philadelphia at Cincinnati
Chicago at Green Bay
Houston at Indianapolis
New Orleans at Kansas City
Oakland at Miami
Baltimore at New York Giants
Minnesota at Tampa Bay
Detroit at Carolina
St. Louis at San Francisco
Arizona at Seattle
San Diego at Pittsburgh
Tennessee at Jacksonville
Dallas at Washington
Cleveland at Buffalo (Monday)

Week 11

I knew something was weird when, after tabulating 11 of 12 results this week, there was a seven-way tie for first. That's right, a seven-way tie. And who was left? Crazy Ed Wagner, otherwise known as dad.

I think we all know what was about to happen.

You got it, dad came through with a 30-14 to obliterate the rest of us by four games, marking the second time this season he's taken home first by crashing an ass-sucking party (it's not unprecedented in other aspects of his life; life as a trucker, you know). Sure, he's still in last, and these kinds of wacky picks could be the reason, but I've made that joke before and the bottom like is he's the winner and I'm the loser so no matter what I say the joke's on me.

Still, I don't think we've ever had the last-place person win two weeks in one season, so this is an occasion to be marked. What's next, a black president?

Speaking of black presidents, at this rate Lane - who undoubtedly was ruled by one at Hendersonville High - is going to mess around and get caught by a guy who missed a week, a feat previously accomplished only by, let's see here, yep, dad. Lane went a contest-worst 23-21 that has actually let dad get within sniffing distance. This is crazy! This is crazy! This is crazy!

And speaking of crazy, our overall race remains ridiculously tight. The top four people all went 26-18, and the only person who didn't - Chip - fell two spots to fifth simply by being a mere one game worse. Rob got to drop his 26-18, which allowed him to pull within one one-thousandth of point of me in second place, while Kristy is now in fourth - three games from first.

As you can see, accuracy is paramount. So I will, again, encourage you to double-check my work.

Here are the games and standings. Lots of good ones, again, this week, and we all have the added shame/humiliation/motivation of being crushed by dad. Let's go regain some pride! Well, except for Lonnie and Cheryl, who are once again contractually obligated to pick Central Florida.

Standings
Weekly winner in bold; worst week in red

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18 (279-134, .676)
2. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18 (277-136, .671)
3. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18 (279-137, .671)
4. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18 (275-137, .667)
5. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19 (276-138, .667)
6. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18 (273-140, .661)
7. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18 (272-142, .657)
8. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19 (266-147, .644)
9. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18 (266-148, .643)
10. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18 (259-154, .627)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21 (255-161, .613)
12. Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14 (244-165, .597)

Week 11
ACC
Maryland at Virginia Tech (Thursday)
Georgia Tech at North Carolina
Clemson at Florida State
North Carolina State at Duke
Virginia at Wake Forest
Notre Dame at Boston College

SEC
Georgia at Kentucky
Arkansas at South Carolina
Wyoming at Tennessee
Tennessee-Martin at Auburn
Alabama at Louisiana State
Florida at Vanderbile

SoCon
Samford at Georgia Southern
Western Carolina at Elon
Appalachian State at Chattanooga
Citadel at Wofford

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners
Kansas at Nebraska
Oregon State at California-Los Angeles
Oklahoma State at Texas Tech

Scratchers
Texas Christian at Utah (Thursday)
Nevada at Fresno State (Friday)
Illinois at Western Michigan
Bowling Green at Ohio
Louisiana-Monroe at Middle Tennessee
Western Illinois at Southern Illinois
New Hampshire at Villanova
Southern Mississippi at Central Florida
Hawaii at New Mexico State
Arkansas State at Florida International
Cincinnati at West Virginia
New Mexico at Nevada-Las Vegas

NFL
Denver at Cleveland (Thursday)
New Orleans at Atlanta
Tennessee at Chicago
Jacksonville at Detroit
Seattle at Miami
Green Bay at Minnesota
Buffalo at New England
St. Louis at New York Jets
Baltimore at Houston
Carolina at Oakland
Indianapolis at Pittsburgh
Kansas City at San Diego
New York Giants at Philadelphia
San Francisco at Arizona (Monday)

Week 10

So, so close to a new weekly winner. Sorry Cheryl.

Bob coupled a 10-4 in the NFL with an 8-2 in the SEC and SoCon to post a 34-13 that gave him his second victory of the season and allowed him to hold off Cheryl by a game. Cheryl went a contest-best 11-2 in scratchers and it looked for a moment like she was going to end the Hunters' long run of futility, but, alas, it was not to be. Still, she whipped Lonnie's ass by five games. That has to count for something.

Cullen and Amy, meanwhile, tied for third at 30-17, while at the other end of the spectrum I was a cool 27-20, the worst in the field, a week after I nearly took the lead. Luckily, Chris was only a game better to blow the chance to give himself a little breathing room, and Chip and Rob were a paltry 29-18 and 28-19, respectively, to remain locked in a tie for third - a thousandth of a point ahead of Kristy. In other words, things remain ridiculously tight. Which reminds me ...

... I'm going to encourage you all to check my scores. At the risk of rubbing more salt in Cheryl's wound, I had her tied with Bob until I went back and found a mistake in the SEC. With things this close, things really could come down to a game. So PLEASE make sure I'm right.

Here are the standings and the schedule. There aren't quite as many games this week, but, as usual, scratchers are a beast. Do well there, and you'll win the week. Unless your name is Cheryl.

Overall standings
(Weekly winner in bold; worst week in red)

1. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19 (253-116, .686)
2. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20 (251-118, .680)
3. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19 (251-119, .678)
4. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18 (250-119, .678)
5. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17 (249-119, .677)
6. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16 (247-122, .669)
7. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13 (246-124, .665)
8. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14 (241-128, .653)
9. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17 (240-130, .649)
10. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19 (233-136, .631)
11. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19 (230-140, .622)
12. Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18 (214-151, .586)

Games
ACC

Miami at Virginia
Florida State at Georgia Tech
Clemson at Boston College
Duke at Wake Forest

SEC

Auburn at Mississippi
Tulsa at Arkansas
Kentucky at Mississippi State
Arkansas State at Alabama
Florida at Georgia
Tennessee at South Carolina
Tulane at Louisiana State

SoCon

Wofford at Appalachian State (Friday)
Georgia Southern at Citadel
Chattanooga at Western Carolina
Furman at Samford

Big 12/Pac 10 headliners

Colorado at Texas A&M
Oregon at California
Texas at Texas Tech

Scratchers

South Florida at Cincinnati (Thursday)
Central Michigan at Indiana
West Virginia at Connecticut
Northwestern at Minnesota
Pittsburgh at Notre Dame
Fresno State at Louisiana Tech
Michigan at Purdue
Wisconsin at Michigan State
Iowa at Illinois
Northern Iowa at Western Illinois
Rice at Texas-El Paso
East Carolina at Central Florida (Sunday)

NFL

New York Jets at Buffalo
Detroit at Chicago
Jacksonville at Cincinnati
Baltimore at Cleveland
Green Bay at Tennessee
Arizona at St. Louis
Houston at Minnesota
Tampa Bay at Kansas City
Miami at Denver
Atlanta at Oakland
Dallas at New York Giants
Philadelphia at Seattle
New England at Indianapolis
Pittsburgh at Washington (Monday)

Week 9

Another week, another different weekly winner. Sort of. Another week, another repeat winner. Sort of.

In what is surely some foreshadowing of this weekend's Furman-Snatchalachin State showdown Rob and I tied for the Week 8 title with matching 34-12s, two games ahead of Kristy and Cullen, who tied for third at 32-12. I beat everyone by losing only seven games in college (thank you, 6-0 in the ACC), but Rob gained the two games he needed to match me with a contest-best 11-3 in the NFL.

Our overall leader Chris, meanwhile, stumbled to a 29-17, while Chip also went 29-17 to allow me to vault English boy into a virtual tie with Asheville Tourists boy in first overall. Rob, meanwhile, is now also a game back of Chip for third overall, while Kristy is a game back of Rob.

Now, technically, Lonnie didn't finish third (he finished fifth), but his 31-15 was the third-best score, and I wanted to take what may be my only chance this year to give him some props. Cheryl, meanwhile, bucked conventional wisdom by beating everyone in scratchers (8-3) and notching an impressive 10-4 NFL performance and still not doing very well overall thanks to a fairly brutal showing in the rest of the college games (2-2 in the SoCon; 3-2 in the SEC? - in the words of Cosmo Kramer YOU REALLY BLEW IT, CHERYL).

Nobody was worse than 8-6 in the NFL - except Lane and dad, who solidified their hold on spots 11 and 12 in the standings with a pair of 5-9s on their way to 25-21 and 24-22 scores, respectively. Worse, neither gets to drop them because Lane went 25-21 last week and dad is shackled to his Week 2 0-51.

Here are the standings and the games. Lots of toughies this week, and lots of good ones. Don't forget we've got one Thursday and Friday. And let me know if I made a mistake.

Standings after Week 7
(weekly winners in bold; worst week in red)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17 (225-97, .699)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12 (224-98, .696)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17 (223-100, .690)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12 (221-101, .686)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14 (219-102, .682)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14 (216-106, .671)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18 (212-111, .656)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20 (210-113, .650)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16 (208-114, .646)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15 (205-117, .637)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21 (202-121, .625)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22 (185-133, .582)

Games
ACC
Boston College at North Carolina
Wake Forest at Miami
Duke at Vanderbilt
Virginia at Georgia Tech
Virginia Tech at Florida State
North Carolina State at Maryland

SEC
Auburn at West Virginia (Thursday)
Kentucky at Florida
Georgia at Louisiana State
Mississippi at Arkansas
Middle Tennessee State at Mississippi State
Alabama at Tennessee

SoCon
Georgia Southern at Western Carolina
Wofford at Elon
Citadel at Samford
Furman at Appalachian State

Pac 10/Big 12 headliners
Texas Tech at Kansas
Oklahoma State at Texas
Texas A&M at Iowa State
Oregon at Arizona State

Scratchers
Boise State at San Jose State (Friday)
Cincinnati at Connecticut
Minnesota at Purdue
Illinois at Wisconsin
Louisiana Tech at Army
Rice at Tulane
Michigan State at Michigan
South Florida at Louisville
James Madison at Villanova
Weber State at Northern Arizona
Florida Atlantic at Louisiana-Monroe
Pennsylvania State at Ohio State
Nevada at Hawaii

NFL
Tampa Bay at Dallas
Washington at Detroit
Buffalo at Miami
St. Louis at New England
San Diego at New Orleans
Kansas City at New York Jets
Atlanta at Philadelphia
Arizona at Carolina
Oakland at Baltimore
Cincinnati at Houston
Cleveland at Jacksonville
New York Giants at Pittsburgh
Seattle at San Francisco
Indianapolis at Tennessee (Monday)

Week 8

Well, the streak of new winners has been broken - and that's not good for anybody not named Chris Smith.

Chris carded a 30-16 to beat Rob by a game and Kristy by two compliments of a sick 10-2 in scratchers that made me go back and make sure I got his e-mail before Saturday's games. Sadly, I did. More importantly, Chris broke his tie with Chip to move into first overall with his second consecutive weekly triumph.

Rob jumped into second after he was the only person in the pool with the cajones to take the Browns last night. Chris, Rob, I and Cullen all went 8-6 in the NFL - best in the pool - while, at the other end of the spectrum, Lonnie and Amy were 6-8. Not much of a spectrum. A crazy week in college was the difference, as outside of Chris we ranged from bad to awful.

Chip (25-21), Amy (24-22), Bob (24-22) and Lane (25-21) were so awful they got to drop the week - but we're all piling up some pretty crappy weeks. Jeez, why don't we pick some easier games?

Here are the updated standings, followed by the games. We've got two on Thursday, but nothing on Friday.

Standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16 (196-80, .710)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21 (194-83, .700)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19 (190-86, .688)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18 (187-88, .680)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17 (187-89, .678)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19 (184-92, .667)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22 (184-93, .664)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22 (184-93, .664)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19 (178-98, .645)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21 (177-100, .639)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18 (174-102, .630)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24 (161-111, .592)

Week 7
ACC
Florida State at North Carolina State (Thursday)
Wake Forest at Maryland
Georgia Tech at Clemson
North Carolina at Virginia
Miami at Duke
Virginia Tech at Boston College

SEC
Vanderbilt at Georgia
Mississippi at Alabama
Arkansas at Kentucky
Mississippi State at Tennessee
Louisiana State at South Carolina

SoCon
Western Carolina at Wofford
Citadel at Furman
Elon at Chattanooga
Appalachian State at Georgia Southern

Pac 10/Big 12 headliners
Nebraska at Iowa State
Kansas at Oklahoma
Stanford at California-Los Angeles
Kansas State at Colorado
Missouri at Texas
California at Arizona

Scratchers
Brigham Young at Texas Christian (Thursday)
Connecticut at Rutgers
Akron at Eastern Michigan
Pittsburgh at Navy
Ohio State at Michigan State
Richmond at Massachusetts
Marshall at Alabama-Birmingham
North Dakota State at Northern Iowa
Cal Poly at South Dakota State
Florida Atlantic at Western Kentucky
San Jose State at New Mexico State

NFL
San Diego at Buffalo
Minnesota at Chicago
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati
Tennessee at Kansas City
Dallas St. Louis
Baltimore at Miami
San Francisco at New York Giants
New Orleans at Carolina
Detroit at Houston
New York Jets at Oakland
Indianapolis at Green Bay
Cleveland at Washington
Seattle at Tampa Bay
Denver at New England (Monday)

Week 7 standings, games

It's looking more and more like the rest of you guys HAVE to win a week.

Chris became our sixth winner in as many tries so far, carding a 32-10 that broke Kristy's heart (and hopes for her first first) by a single game thanks to a perfect, and unmatched, 4-0 performance in the SoCon. Amazingly, he was the only person to pick Elon. And, yes, Bob and I will make him pay for not respecting our authority.

Chip and Rob tied for third at 30-12, both going 10-4 in the NFL. Cheryl and dad managed to do that as well, but let's just say they weren't quite as efficient in college.

Chris also kept up his pattern of silently stalking around near the top, waiting for the leader to slip up, and after three weeks he finally got his opportunity. My third straight shitty performance, this time a 26-16, allowed Chris and Chip to jump me into a tie for the overall lead while I slipped to third. Kristy, meanwhile, climbed up to fourth.

Here are the standings and games, again. I've also sent hard copies via pigeon for those of you who requested them.

Overall standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12 (166-64, .722)
Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10 (166-64, .722)
Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16 (163-67, .709)
Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11 (159-70, .694)
Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21, 28-14 (158-72, .687)
Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12 (158-72, .687)
Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17 (157-73, .683)
Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17 (156-74, .678)
Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15 (151-79, .657)
Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14 (150-80, .652)
Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18 (146-84, .635)
Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18 (139-87, .615)

This week's games
ACC
Clemson at Wake Forest (Thursday)
East Carolina at Virginia
Notre Dame at North Carolina
Gardner-Webb at Georgia Tech
Central Florida at Miami

SEC
South Carolina at Kentucky
Vanderbilt at Mississippi State
Tennessee at Georgia
Arkansas at Auburn
Louisiana State at Florida

SoCon
Western Carolina at Furman
Elon at Citadel
Chattanooga at Wofford
Appalachian State at Samford

Pac 10/Big 12 headliners
Texas at Oklahoma
Kansas State at Texas A&M
Nebraska at Texas Tech
Arizona at Stanford
Iowa State at Baylor
Oklahoma State at Missouri

Scratchers
Louisville at Memphis (Friday)
Iowa at Indiana
Eastern Michigan at Army
Ohio at Kent
Michigan State at Northwestern
Western Michigan at Buffalo
James Madison at Richmond
Montana at Eastern Washington
Bowling Green at Akron
Middle Tennessee at Florida International
Western Illinois at North Dakota State
Pennsylvania State at Wisconsin

NFL
Chicago at Atlanta
Baltimore at Indianapolis
Detroit at Minnesota
Oakland at New Orleans
Cincinnati at New York Jets
Carolina at Tampa Bay
St. Louis at Washington
Miami at Houston
Jacksonville at Denver
Dallas at Arizona
Philadelphia at San Francisco
Green Bay at Seattle
New England at San Diego
New York Giants at Cleveland (Monday)

Week 7 games

I haven't done the standings yet (I don't want to know), but here are this week's games so you can get to workin' on 'em:

ACC
Clemson at Wake Forest (Thursday)
East Carolina at Virginia
Notre Dame at North Carolina
Gardner-Webb at Georgia Tech
Central Florida at Miami

SEC
South Carolina at Kentucky
Vanderbilt at Mississippi State
Tennessee at Georgia
Arkansas at Auburn
Louisiana State at Florida

SoCon
Western Carolina at Furman
Elon at Citadel
Chattanooga at Wofford
Appalachian State at Samford

Pac 10/Big 12 headliners
Texas at Oklahoma
Kansas State at Texas A&M
Nebraska at Texas Tech
Arizona at Stanford
Iowa State at Baylor
Oklahoma State at Missouri

Scratchers
Louisville at Memphis (Friday)
Iowa at Indiana
Eastern Michigan at Army
Ohio at Kent
Michigan State at Northwestern
Western Michigan at Buffalo
James Madison at Richmond
Montana at Eastern Washington
Bowling Green at Akron
Middle Tennessee at Florida International
Western Illinois at North Dakota State
Pennsylvania State at Wisconsin

NFL
Chicago at Atlanta
Baltimore at Indianapolis
Detroit at Minnesota
Oakland at New Orleans
Cincinnati at New York Jets
Carolina at Tampa Bay
St. Louis at Washington
Miami at Houston
Jacksonville at Denver
Dallas at Arizona
Philadelphia at San Francisco
Green Bay at Seattle
New England at San Diego
New York Giants at Cleveland (Monday)

Week 6

Dear 2008 picks racers,

Welcome to the first installment of our Picks Race blog. I was going to go back and put the first five weeks in here as well, but then I realized just how pathetically useless that would make my life look. It's one thing for it to actually be pathetically useless; it's quite another for everyone to see it.

And speaking of pathetically useless, that sums up most of us for last week as we pretty much got our collective asses handed to us. Except for one ass, that is, which remains firmly but gently cupped by its owner. Dad pulled out a, shall we say, somewhat unexpected victory with a dominant 32-15 that would have been ever more dominant had be not neglected to include Mississippi State-LSU and Alabama-Georgia in his selections or let anyone know that he was picking UConn to beat Louisville BEFORE UConn beat Louisville.

Yet those three giveaway losses were still not enough for anyone else to get closer than two games, making Ed the fifth winner in five weeks. Now that's parity, right? And are you seven people who still haven't managed to win feeling like losers yet? Don't worry about it - we'll be giving away as many coveted Sportsmanship Ribbons as necessary when this is over in February.

The Monday night game was pivotal when it came to deciding second and third as the Steelers' OT victory gave Chip a 30-17 and sole possession of the runner-up spot while Rob took third at 29-18. After that, it was fugly for the third straight week. Cullen, Bob and Lonnie tied for the worst showing at 26-21, though I, Cheryl and Lane weren't much better at 27-20. I, Cullen, Amy, Bob, Lane and Lonnie all dropped the week, but when you're trading your raw sewage for plain old shit it doesn't help all that much (incidentally, I pondered for some time which a person would rather have, raw sewage or shit, and decided on the shit. I'll be interested to hear any counter-arguments, however).

One thing I've concluded is that I've got to start giving us some easier games. Scratchers are a, pardon my German, fucking bitch, and winning scratchers pretty much always gives you the week. Ed was a mind-boggling 9-2 in this category (really 10-1 if he'd turned UConn in before Saturday morning), and to give you an idea how messed up it was to do that well nobody else was better than 5-6 and five people were 3-8 or worse (actually, the only one worse than 3-8 was Cullen's equally astonishing 2-9 showing, but I didn't want to embarrass him by singling him out).

There was little change in the overall standings. Dad is going to need a lot more 9-2 performances in scratchers to get out of the cellar, while the log jam at the top got a little bit tighter. I'm still a game ahead of Chip, who is two games ahead of Chris, who is two games ahead of Cullen, who is a game ahead of Amy, who is a game ahead of Bob, who is a game ahead of Kristy - you get the picture.

Finally, let me know what you think of this blog idea for the picks race. I'll still be sending this out in e-mail form, but I'll encourage you to leave your picks (as well as your sarcastic comments) under the comments section of this blog. Once we get used to it, I think it'll be more fun and easier.

Week 6
ACC
Duke at Georgia Tech
Boston College at North Carolina State
Western Kentucky at Virginia Tech
Florida State at Miami
Connecticut at North Carolina
Maryland at Virginia

SEC
Florida at Arkansas
South Carolina at Mississippi
Kentucky at Alabama
Auburn at Vanderbilt
Northern Illinois at Tennessee

SoCon
Samford at Western Carolina
Furman at Elon
Citadel at Appalachian State
Georgia Southern at Chattanooga

Pac 10/Big 12 headliners
Oregon State at Utah (Thursday)
Texas Tech at Kansas State
Texas at Colorado
Missouri at Nebraska
Stanford at Notre Dame
Arizona State at California
Oregon at Southern California

Head-scratchers
Memphis at Alabama-Birmingham
Cincinnati at Marshall
Nevada-Las Vegas at Colorado State
Illinois at Michigan
Akron at Kent
Ohio State at Wisconsin

NFL
Kansas City at Carolina
Chicago at Detroit
Atlanta at Green Bay
San Diego at Miami
Seattle at New York Giants
Washington at Philadelphia
Tennessee at Baltimore
Indianapolis at Houston
Tampa Bay at Denver
Buffalo at Arizona
New England at San Francisco
Cincinnati at Dallas
Pittsburgh at Jacksonville
Minnesota at New Orleans (Monday)

Overall standings
(Weekly win in bold; worst week in red)

1. Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20 (137-51, .729)
2. Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17 (136-52, .723)
3. Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19 (134-54, .713)
4. Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21 (132-56, .702)
5. Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19 (131-57, .697)
6. Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21 (130-58, .691)
7. Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19 (128-59, .684)
8. Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18 (128-60, .681)
9. Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20 (124-64, .660)
10. Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20 (122-66, .649)
11. Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21 (122-66, .649)
12. Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15 (115-69, .625)