Rob went with his heart last week while Spawn of Satan Smith and Lucifer's Little Helper Kowalske stuck with their slavish worship of gambling odds, and it wasn't pretty for our hero. Heaven's rejects tied for the win with sizzling 26-7s, while Rob's feelings may have cost him any chance at the prize coconuts by leading him down a 19-14 road.
The result was Chris strengthening his overall lead yet again, with Kristy climbing back up to second overall and notching her first weekly win of the 2008 season (sort of). Rob? Well, this story's protagonist is face down in a gutter at fifth overall with Amy nipping at his heels. It's a fall worthy of an Illinois governor. Or really any governor these days. Jeez, those guys are scumbags.
In other news:
- I carded a 25-8 for third, allowing me to climb into a dead tie with Cullen (24-9) for third overall. We ruled largely because of our contest-best 13-3s in the NFL.
- Rob may have thrown in the towel, but Chip put his in one of those bazooka things they use at games and launched it into the second deck with a contest-worst 18-15 that dropped him to seventh and falling. This better not be because he's been watching too much soccer, but something has to explain that 8-8 in the NFL ...
- Lonnie (23-10) extended his lead over his wife (20-13), and note that now that she's slightly ahead of Lane in the standings I don't even use her name anymore. She's just a stereotypical label, as all women should be.
- Speaking of Lane (not to mention women), he bitch-slapped Ed (20-13) back into 12th with a strong 24-9 that shuffled the bottom of the standings for the second week in a row. This is what it would be like if the Lions and Bengals were in the division. In other words, fantastic.
- I think we can all assume from his silence that Lane is a good sport about all of our unsolicited cracks. Either that, or he's patiently preparing for the waiting period to be up on his high-powered rifle.
FCS playoffs
Montana at James Madison (Friday)
Richmond at Northern Iowa
NFL
New Orleans at Chicago (Thursday)
Tampa Bay at Atlanta
Washington at Cincinnati
Detroit at Indianapolis
San Diego at Kansas City
Green Bay at Jacksonville
Seattle at St. Louis
San Francisco at Miami
Buffalo at New York Jets
Tennessee at Houston
Minnesota at Arizona
Denver at Carolina
Pittsburgh at Baltimore
New England at Oakland
New York Giants at Dallas
Cleveland at Philadelphia (Monday)
Standings
(weekly win in bold; worst week in red)
- Chris 34-8, 37-14, 35-13, 28-19, 28-19, 32-10, 30-16, 29-17, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 37-11, 33-16, 39-19, 26-7 (442-204, .684)
- Kristy 30-12, 39-12, 27-21, 31-16, 28-19, 31-11, 28-18, 32-14, 30-17, 26-18, 31-14, 35-13, 31-18, 37-21, 26-7 (435-210, .674)
- Cullen 35-7, 38-13, 31-17, 28-19, 26-21, 25-17, 27-19, 32-14, 31-16, 26-18, 32-13, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 24-9 (435-211, .673)
- Ron 33-9, 38-13, 37-11, 29-18, 27-20, 26-16, 27-19, 34-12, 27-20, 26-18, 27-18, 35-13, 29-20, 42-16, 25-8 (435-211, .673)
- Rob 31-11, 37-14, 31-17, 29-18, 29-18, 30-12, 29-17, 34-12, 29-18, 26-18, 31-14, 34-14, 28-21, 40-18, 19-14 (429-215, .666)
- Amy 32-10, 40-11, 29-19, 30-17, 28-19, 25-17, 24-22, 26-20, 30-17, 26-18, 34-11, 35-13, 31-18, 40-18, 22-11 (428-219, .662)
- Chip 33-9, 41-10, 32-16, 28-19, 30-17, 30-12, 25-21, 29-17, 28-19, 25-19, 27-18, 34-14, 34-15, 38-20, 18-15 (427-220, .660)
- Bob 31-11, 34-17, 31-17, 34-13, 26-21. 28-14, 24-22, 28-18, 34-13, 26-18, 27-18, 34-14, 26-23, 40-18, 22-11 (421-226, .651)
- Lonnie 30-12, 37-14, 28-20, 27-20, 26-21, 24-18, 28-18, 31-15, 28-19, 26-18, 28-17, 35-13, 31-18, 39-19, 23-10 (415-231, .642)
- Cheryl 29-13, 35-16, 33-15, 26-21, 27-20, 27-15, 27-19, 30-16, 33-14, 25-19, 29-16, 30-18, 28-21, 36-22, 20-13 (409-237, .633)
- Lane 30-12, 34-17, 30-18, 28-19, 27-20, 28-14, 25-21, 25-21, 28-19, 23-21, 32-13, 29-19, 21-28, 30-28, 24-9 (393-251, .610)
- Dad 28-14, 0-51, 30-18, 25-22, 32-15, 24-18, 22-24, 24-22, 29-18, 30-14, 33-12, 31-17, 29-20, 33-25, 20-13 (390-252, .607)
19 comments:
True to form, I collapse somewhere around the UGA / FLA game every year. Just wait until my bowl game picks. I think I'm going to go with a Disney Theme since i'm proably going down to the Capital One Bowl to watch Georgia throw up all overthemselves and lose by 20 or so to Michigan State. My only hope, Michigan State scores about 40 or 50 points so Richt will start firing his special team and defensive coaches. I'd say fire the offensive coordinator, but that's just me and some say i'm evil.
Anywhoo -- my picks and finally, some comments -- most are question because I'm sure Bob and Cullen will know the answers. I've got lots of questions since I've been MIA a lot lately:
Montana at JMU -- I think its JMU's year. In fact, I actually have tickets to the game. Nothing like shotgunning beers in Chattanooga at 4 PM on a Friday afternoon.
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa -- How great was it to watch Michigan throw down on Duke. The Wolverines looked Thugtastic -- almost Cincy / Bob Huggins thug tastic!
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (Thursday) -- What if Stephan Curry comes back for his senior year? Better yet, what if someone in the southern conference beats Davidson this year? When was the last time Davidson lost in conference?
Tampa Bay at ATLANTA -- Matt Ryan is a really good guy. I was kinda hoping he'd walk around town and hook up with strippers and maybe start a dog fighting ring, but that's just not going to happen.
WASAH at Cincinnati -- rumor has it Bob and I are in the running for the Auburn job. We might be the only two people who will take it.
Detroit at INDY -- Did I not tell you that MISS State would fire Sylvester Croom?
San Diego at KC -- Dan Mullen to MISS State is a bad bad bad idea. Umm, where is he going to recruit? There a talent pool in Hattiesburg that only Dan Mullen knows?
Green Bay at DA VILLE -- When I was in college, I cheered for Louisville because I dated a girl from there. Interestingly enough, Da Ville made the great 8 that year and lost to UNC plus I won the dorm hoop challenge run by Roger Dorn. True story.
SEATTLE at St. Louis -- That guy from USC that took the job in Seattle has no clue what he's getting into. That team is bad. In other news, I love to watch how USC talks trash about going to another Rose Bowl -- hey, if you knuckle heads could beat your crappy Pac 10 teams, you'd play in a national championship. Stop complaining. You lost to a team with a tailback named jizz.
San Francisco at MIAMI -- Apparently, UCF might need a new coach -- what after O'Leary might have killed his second player this year. That guy belongs in sanitation, not coaching football.
Buffalo at JETS -- I'm pretty sure Clemson made rash decision by hiring Dabo. Not sure I like head coaches that chest bump players -- unless your Chuck the Chest!
Tennessee at HOUSTON - Another young NFL coach comes to the SEC. Super. Which means John Chavis will need a job -- dear UGA, hire him.
Minnesota at ZONA -- What if Paul Johnson went to Tech -- according to some Auburn people in my office, that's what's going to happen. They also thought they were going to a bowl game.
Denver at CAROLINA -- I bet Stillerman is happy. Oh and did everyone see the Bobby Bowden pep talk before the BC game? Yeah, it inspired me to sleep a little bit more.
Pittsburgh at BALTIMORE -- I think they need to show The Program on a loop on TNT. Maybe they need The Program part two. Scott Caan could play the head coach -- after all, he played Tweeter in Varsity Blues.
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland -- Does Hal Mumme still coach? And what happened to Tim Couch? or that Red Headed guy at wake forest that got beat up.
New York Giants at DALLAS - What if Furman hired Billy Napier and got rid of Lamb?
Cleveland at PHILLY (Monday)-- And the worst coach move of the year -- Kansas State: Fire your coach and bring back a 60 year old man who retired for the aforementioned fired coach. Stupid.
Amy's picks. Here she comes, Chip ...
FCS playoffs
Montana at JAMES MADISON (Friday)
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (Thursday)
TB at Atlanta
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati
Detroit at INDY
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City
GB at Jacksonville
SEATTLE at St. Louis
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NY JETS
TN at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
Denver at CAROLINA
PITT at Baltimore
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
NY GIANTS at Dallas
Cleveland at PHILLY (Monday)
I got Da Bears. And let me just say while I'm thinking about it how sad I am that we never got around to calling Sylvester Croom Sly.
I'll take the Bears over the Aints.
Also, I will take JMU over Montana.
Lonnie and Cheryl both take NEW ORLEANS
chicagooooo
Rob Thursday:
I'll take Chicago over new orleans and don't worry i'll have comments later, like where the fuck are Chris's picks every week. I sure would like to see them before the following Monday, so i may know who he picks every once in a while.
Rob's wish is Chris' command:
FCS playoffs
Montana at JAMES MADISON (Friday)
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (Thursday)
Tampa Bay at ATLANTA
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati
Detroit at INDY
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City
GREEN BAY at Jacksonville
SEATTLE at St. Louis
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NEW YORK JETS
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
Denver at CAROLINA
PITTSBURGH at Baltimore
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
NEW YORK GIANTS at Dallas
Cleveland at PHILLY (Monday)
FCS playoffs
Montana at JMU (Montana is still reeling from Ron Paul not getting elected)
Richmond at UNI (No, this isn't sour grapes. In fact I have good reasoning for this that I won't share because I want people to pick Richmond so I can win. Chris already fell into the trap. Who you gonna trust, me or LudaChris? Don't answer that)
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (I have New Orleans kicker in my fantasy semi-finals and so far he's got a whopping two points. Garrett Hartley? More like Garrett Fartley. Good burn Cullen, put that one in the act)
Tampa Bay at ATLANTA (The Burner Michael Turner is a great nickname. Flyin Matt Ryan and Roddy White Power are nicknames waiting in the wings)
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati (Bob's not the only one who can come up with movie ideas... "The Wonder Lick Test"... Ryan Fitzpatrick plays a QB from Harvard who gets sacked so brutally due to a shoddy offensive line that he bites off his tongue. To make matters worse it gets stepped on and they have to get him a tongue transplant. The only one they can find is from a serial killer. Fitzpatrick's new tongue takes over his mind and makes him kill his own offensive linemen)
Detroit at INDY (Woo hoo, Garrett Fartley with a FG!)
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City (Ron Burgundy. Stay classy, San Diego. Hello, Baxter? Baxter, is that you? Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee. Is this Wilt Chamberlain? Have the decency to say something.)
GREEN BAY at Jacksonville (I'm just glad that Tony Kornholer won't be doing this game)
SEATTLE at St. Louis (Man, Mike Holmgren sure picked the wrong season to leave)
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NYJ
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
DENVER at Carolina
PITTSBURGH at Baltimore
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
New York Giants at PHALLUS (Ok, seriously... I'm not 100% sure if Terrell Owens is gay or not... but he's definitely a faggot)
Cleveland at PHILLY
I had some cool comments typed out on Wednesday, but my computer decided to crash on me right before I left to take my exam. So you are deprived of my pointing out that Ron forgot to also note that Rob's poor week gave him the mark of the beast as a winning percentage.
FCS playoffs
MONTANA at James Madison (Friday)
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (Thursday)(I made a verbal pick last night)
Tampa Bay at ATLANTA
Washington at CINCINNATI
Detroit at INDY
San Diego at KANSAS CITY
GREEN BAY at Jacksonville
Seattle at STL (Boy, the shitty games are all over the early time slot on Sunday)
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NYJ (Suddenly this game has become the moveable force against the resistable object)
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
Denver at CAROLINA
Pittsburgh at BALTIMORE
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
NYG at Dallas (So Romo and TO are having marital difficulties. What is the over under on how many minutes after a loss in this game it will take for TO to accidentally call Romo a "homo". It worked oh so well for TO and Jeff Garcia)
Cleveland at PHILLY (Monday)
FCS playoffs
Montana at DUKES MAYONNAISE I suddenly realize I have no idea how to spell mayonnaise. Is that right? Even worse, with App's losses to both JMU and Bitchmond, there can be no doubt that the CAA is far and away the best FCS conference.
BITCHMOND at Northern Iowa I thought this was a gutsy pick until I saw that Vegas has the Spiders favored by four, so, of course, Spawn of Satan Smith is going with them as well.
NFL
New Orleans at DA BEARS Let's play a little Seinfeld trivia: What did the bubble boy's father do for a living?
Tampa Bay at WEST HENDERSON What's the bubble boy's name?
RACIALLY INSENSITIVE MASCOT at Cincinnati Why didn't Jerry like his girlfriend in the bubble boy episode?
Detroit at INDY What kind of car is George driving on their way to the bubble boy's house?
STAY CLASSY at Kansas City Why can't Kramer go with them to the cabin in the bubble boy episode?
FUDGE PACKERS at Jacksonville What does Jerry write on the autographed picture he gives the waitress at the diner?
Seattle at ST. LOUIS OK, I have to take a break here to post this link before the season's over. In light of the Rams, uhhhh, "team" this year, this has never been more fitting: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7wwKzijVns
San Francisco at THE MAMMALS Sorry for that. Speaking of dolphins, what does George pull out the whale's blowhole?
Buffalo at NEW YORK BRETTS Speaking of games at the Meadowlands, what name does the guy who played Henri on Cheers share with a notorious serial killer, which is announced all over the stadium during his date with Elaine?
TITANS at Houston Why is this name announced in the stadium?
Minnesota at ZONA Speaking of Arizona and that dry air, what does Jerry get caught doing by the model whose number he recently got?
Denver at PANTHERS Jerry Richardson needs a heart transplant. There's nothing funny about that.
Pittsburgh at BALLS'MORE Where did Jerry get said model's number?
SCREW ENGLAND at Oakland OK, I can't resist a little Henri trivia: When Woody tells Henri "I thought I told you to get your hands off my girlfriend", what is Henri's reply?
New York Giants at PHALLUS What's Woody's reply to Henri's reply?
Cleveland at PHILLY God I'm a loser. I'll post the answers next week.
FCS playoffs
Montana at JAMES MADISON (Friday)
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa
NFL
New Orleans at CHICAGO (Thursday)
Tampa Bay at ATLANTA
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati
Detroit at INDIANAPOLIS
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City
GREEN BAY at Jacksonville
SEATTLE at St. Louis
San Fran at MIAMI
Buffalo at NEW YORK
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
Denver at CAROLINA
Pittsburgh at BALTIMORE
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
New York Giants at DALLAS
Cleveland at PHILADELPHIA (Monday)
Lonnie and Cheryl both take JAMES MADISON
Cheryl Takes Richmond
Lonnie take Northern Iowa
Cheryl's Picks
FCS playoffs
Montana at JAMES MADISON (Friday)
RICHMOND at Northern Iowa
NFL
NEW ORLEANS at Chicago (Thursday)
TAMPA BAY at Atlanta
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati
Detroit at INDIANAPOLIS
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City
Green Bay at JACKSONVILLE
SEATTLE at St. Louis
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NEW YORK JETS
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
DENVER at Carolina
PITTSBURGH at Baltimore
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
New York Giants at DALLAS
Cleveland at PHILADELPHIA (Monday)
Lonnie's Picks
FCS playoffs
Montana at JAMES MADISON (Friday)
Richmond at NORTHERN IOWA
NFL
NEW ORLEANS at Chicago (Thursday)
TAMPA BAY at Atlanta
WASHINGTON at Cincinnati
Detroit at INDIANAPOLIS
SAN DIEGO at Kansas City
Green Bay at JACKSONVILLE
Seattle at ST. LOUIS
San Francisco at MIAMI
Buffalo at NEW YORK JETS
TENNESSEE at Houston
Minnesota at ARIZONA
Denver at CAROLINA
PITTSBURGH at Baltimore
NEW ENGLAND at Oakland
NEW YORK GIANTS at Dallas
Cleveland at PHILADELPHIA (Monday)
Rob's picks:
I offer no apologies for picking against the Vegas odd's last week better known as 'Oceans 11 Smith'. All you gutless wonders continue to pick in lockstep with Chris and follow behind him right across the finish line. Years from now I will be remembered as a trailblazer. A 5th place trailblazer. Kristy you suck too. I still believe we are all losing to a girl who doesn't know how many people are on the field at one time during a game. Sorry Ron, but it is how we all feel.
COLLEGE
montana JAMES MADISON
richmond NORTHERN IOWA (I doubt richmond gets 5 int's this week. 33 points off 6 turnovers is not great offense and Ron and Bob can never cry again about the breaks all going app's way. All but one of those INT's were giftwrapped for Richmond last week. But the ride had to end one of these days.)
NFL
TAMPA atlanta (Hey cullen, how about a daytime show Cookin with Brookings? Yea I'm not as good as you at this)
WASHINGTON cincy
detroit INDY (boy Congress is bailing out the wrong sinking ship in detroit if you ask me)
SAN DIEGO kansas city
green bay JACKSONVILLE
seattle ST LOUIS (the seahawks are the best 2-11 team in the league. Every single sports team in Washington State is bad at the same time, college and pro)
san fran MIAMI
buffalo JETS (can the jets please figure out if they want to be good or not)
tennessee MATT SCHAUB
minnesota ARIZONA
denver CAROLINA (this is exactly the game carolina loses at home every year)
pittsburgh BALTIMORE
PATRIOTS raiders
giants DALLAS (right now me and ron are secretly cooking up a new scoring scheme to freeze chris out of the money. Can we hire a drifter to kill terrell owens please)
cleveland PHILLY (WHY IS CLEVELAND ON PRIMETIME AGAIN????????)
Post a Comment